Toxic Divorce: A Workbook for Alienated Parents
Award-Winner in the “Parenting/Family: Divorce” Category of the 2012 International Book Awards, Los Angeles, California.
Dr. Kathleen M. Reay, Author
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Are you a professional who works with families of divorce?
Mental health, medical and legal professionals will find the information in this book extremely valuable to help their clients and work in the best interests of alienated children. Read what one professional says about this book by scrolling down this page.
Are you an alienated parent dealing with a toxic divorce?
- Is your former spouse making derogatory remarks about you to your children?
- Have your children become really angry with you?
- Is your ex claiming that your children don’t want to see you anymore?
- Do your children no longer want to have anything to do with your family, friends, or pets?
- Is your ex resisting or refusing to cooperate by not allowing you access to your children?
If you answer yes to one or more questions, then parental alienation (PA) or parental alienation syndrome (PAS) may be occurring. This workbook will provide the knowledge, understanding, real-life examples, step-by-step directions, and powerful strategies to deal with the ramifications of PA or PAS. Alienated parents will learn effective ways to overcome negative thoughts, feelings, and behaviors that can stand in the way of not being able to rebuild loving relationships with their children. Mental health and legal professionals will find the information in this book extremely valuable to help their clients and work in the best interests of alienated children.
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Here’s What One Professional Says About This Book -April 2012
Dr. Reay’s comprehensive book Toxic Divorce: A Workbook for Alienated Parents proves not only that “knowledge is power” but also that knowledge can mean self-awareness and self-esteem. Dr. Reay’s book provides practical and easy to understand tools and techniques to help those dealing with the repercussions of alienation. Readers are guided in identifying and successfully coping with the many negative emotions associated with parental alienation (PA), parental alienation syndrome (PAS), and hostile aggressive parenting (HAP), such as stress, anxiety, anger, and fear.
Typically, targeted parents and alienated children sustain consistent, longstanding emotional abuse. The worst possible outcome for an abused parent or child is to be left in the dark to continue to suffer at the hands of the abuser/alienator, to have their feelings pushed aside or minimized due to ignorance. This book bears witness to the victims of abuse and, in doing so, validates their pain and suffering.
By outlining potential characteristics and motivations of an alienator, Dr. Reay reassures alienated individuals that what they may be experiencing is not their fault while at the same time ensures they recognize that they can only change themselves, their behavior, and their own reactions. It also helps friends and family members better understand the horrifying dynamics of this hideous syndrome, which in turn puts them in a position to provide support rather than accidentally perpetuating the alienation.
It should be noted that change is more likely if there is a specific plan for change provided. Dr. Reay’s brilliance shines through in her inclusion of educative and self-awareness exercises at the end of each chapter, which systematically builds on the previous chapter, providing opportunities for positive reinforcement and empowerment. One that prominently stands out is how to resist reacting in anger at the alienated child. This particular lesson, that includes a plan for not falling into this trap, addresses the targeted parent and those friends and family members wanting to protect that parent to prevent further psychological damage to the alienated child.
Alienated parents are encouraged to slow down and process their feelings, which is crucial during times of incredible stress. Another valuable part of Dr. Reay’s book is how to cope with loss and grief and the multiple assaults to a person’s sense of stability when their life as they knew it has taken a drastic turn.
In summary, this book can be used by alienated parents on their own or together with a mental health professional. Information gathered while answering the questions can also assist attorneys while preparing cases. As a postdoctoral student, I found this book easy to read with invaluable information surrounding the complicated dynamics of PA, PAS and HAP. I recommend this book to all parents engrossed in these syndromes and for those that work with these individuals.
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